Victorious Hearts A Fire (6-11)

Victorious Hearts A Fire (6-11)

*see previous review for author, fandom and summary*

I’m BACK!

So, a refresher. Cat and Robbie are together, Beck and Jade are together, Tori and Andre are still broken up. Tori is being really annoying (shocker!) and Jade wrote a play that she and the rest of the Victorious gang are going to put on at a festival in Seattle. iCarly is referenced loosely so far, but I think it’s going to come up quite a bit in the next few chapters. Anyway, we left off with them basically getting ready to go to Seattle.

And back to the show.

Robbie’s being such a nice boyfriend grabbing Cat’s luggage for her. Way to go Robbie. Ten boyfriend points to you.

Now, I’m iffy on this keyboard thing. I own a keyboard, and while it’s not overly heavy or anything, it is big and bulky. I don’t think it was be easy, necessarily, to carry it under your arm, but I don’t think it would be impossible.

“This trip is not about you.” Um…it kind of is, Trina. The reason they’re all going to Seattle and need you to chaperone is because they’re doing a festival. You just happened to luck out getting a modeling job with Spencer.

Whoa. Who is talking? There’s no tags!

How did Trina think she was going to sleep at a hotel without paying? That girl’s a mystery, I tell you.

“Even though it was probably a bad idea.” No, it’s probably a very, very, very good idea Andre!

Okay, maybe I’m just really confused. I don’t understand why Andre needs to give Tori time when Tori is the one who kissed Beck. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

Andre’s going crazy, Tori thinks she’s helping but she’s probably not.

And now Tori’s going crazy. Man, Andre and Tori are definitely a match made in heaven haha.

Love Jade. My fave.

Trina has a flat tire and “asks” Beck to fix it for her. Trina is such a *insert bad word of your choice here*

The “jealousy” or whatever you want to refer to it as is coming out of Cat full force now. On one hand, I see where Cat and Jade are coming from. I’d be really mad if my boyfriend jumped at every opportunity to please another girl. But on the other hand, I guess I don’t understand what’s wrong with the whole ‘Beck said she was like a sister to him’ thing. Why is that bad?

Cat gets a text about her brother. Clearly she loves her brother very much and is really worried about him. 

Robbie gets 10 more boyfriend points for following her to make sure she’s okay, leaving Robbie with 20 boyfriend points so far.

Just wanted to point out most car rental places won’t let you unless you’re 21, and even at that they would charge you giant fee.

Alright, tension between Cat and Tori is reaching it’s peak, I think. I’m just waiting for it to go overboard.

Still love Jade.

Awww! I smell a hint of a very serious Cabbie moment!!!

It’s really cute that Andre is singing to Tori, but I wish they’d just freakin’ kiss and make up already. 

Seriously, I’m dying. I think it would make everyone very happy. At least Cat and Jade would know that 

Tori’s not after their men.

Ten boyfriend points to Beck for A. dealing with Jade in the morning and B. getting up to get her coffee. 

Insert childish giggle here. Ironically, I was talking about how immature I am today. I guess this is what I get for it.

Totally dig the playful bickering between Jade and Andre.

And here comes the overboard. Right in the middle of IHOP!! Yes! Let the drama begin!

Whoa. Low blow, Jade. Low blow. This is getting crazy! I bet the other people at IHOP are like ‘get these rascal teenagers out of here!’

Jade’s apology is just TOO funny!!

Oh look, a man who knows how to apologize and mean it. Too bad he’s a fictional character.

Oh. My. God. They JUST got into Seattle and Trina already hit someone. And she’s screaming in his ear. 

As much as I should be like ‘Oh my God’ in shock, I can’t stop laughing. It’s just so typical Trina.

Ohhhh my God. No way! Barely into Seattle and she hits her BOSS? This just gets better and better.

Spencer and Trina sitting in a tree….

“Is your sister hitting on the dude she ran over, Tor?” Yes, Andre. Yes, she is.

Alright so Spencer passed out and they called an ambulance. Trina is being dramatic insisting she stay with Spencer until Carly gets there. I can’t imagine Carly is going to be too please with the girl who just hit her brother being around him.

Cat and Tori heart-to-heart conversation is so great, especially when Cat mentions Andre and Tori gets all shy and weird haha.

More Trina/Spencer. Is this really happening? (I’m a major, huge, obsessed Jerry Trainor fan. Sorry.)

Hit him…or hit ON him ;)

Lame joke. Sorry.

Is it just me, or was anybody else really hoping the sentence was ‘decide what positions I want you in’ instead of poses? Man, I’m the worst.

Manly chat. There’s quite a bit of conversation going on in this chapter. Not a bad thing at all. Just very curious what it’s leading up to. I'm very curious to hear just what the boys think of Tori, and if they understand, on some level, where Cat and Jade are coming from. It would be nice to see them show compassion while still not being like 'well you're right and I get it and whatever." Does that make sense? 

Maybe they get a little defensive? We'll see what happens.

 WELCOME BACK ICARLY!

 I can't be the only one really excited about Gibby. He's so awesome! I'm kind of like a pedophile (ask 

@aldysgal on twitter...she'll verify) because I have a minor crush on Noah Munck. Nothing close to Jerry Trainor, but you get the picture.

 If the author made this just a Sam and Jade story, I'd be happy. I love getting the mean girls together. I cannot imagine what this "vacation" is going to be like with Sam and Jade at each others throats the whole time.

 Then again, I think Jade is really going to jump on Carly here. Probably not because she cares TOO much for Robbie, but because Cat is her best friend and Carly's moving in on Cat's boyfriend. THAT will be MUCH more interesting to read, if it happens, than Sam and Jade (which should have been the new show instead of Sam and Cat. I'm just throwing that out there).

 Okay, I guess they're going up to Carly's apartment now? Yes, I'm sure that's what's happening. Jade doesn't seem pleased (surprise, surprise).

 Oh Lewbert. I don't know what it is, but whenever Lewbert is mentioned in a story I have to laugh. Even if the writer doesn't make him do anything funny I laugh just because it's Lewbert.

“You eat, right?” Lol best line ever.

I was team Seddie before, but if I had to make a decision based on this fic I would definitely choose Seddie. 

The chemistry between them in this story is just awesome and I love their personalities meshed together.

I won’t fight with you if you give me chocolate chip cookies. Smooth, Sam. As if Cat is much of a challenge for you.

Back off, Carly. You’re going to get yourself killed.  I wonder if the warning about not making Jade made was foreshadowing into something that’s going to happen.

Jade has caught on. Yes. I’m ready for some MAJOR drama.

Alright, after a trip down memory lane of the most horrible (awkward, weird) vacations ever, everybody is now ready to go to bed. I suspect there’s going to be some crazy Carly going on while Cat and Robbie are saying goodnight.

So….Cat and Robbie HAVEN’T had sex? I’m so utterly confused about that.

Ease up, Shay!

Start off with some Bade action right in the beginning of chapter nine. I have a feeling we’re going to hear much more of Jade’s thoughts on Carly. I must admit, the stabs at Robbie in that one sentence got to be a bit too much. I think a little less name calling at one time would have made it more readable.

“The Hollywood Arts gang had been expecting the typical fancy diner considering the high end part of Seattle that they followed the icarly gang into but was pleasantly surprised when they parked and Freddie and Sam led them into a simple diner with a sign proclaiming that it was Josie's Diner in bright blue on the window.” Consider the phrasing of your sentences. All I read from this sentence is ‘diner.’ I think saying something like “The Hollywood Arts gang had been expecting the typical fancy diner considering the high end part of Seattle that they followed the iCarly gang in to, but they were pleasantly surprised when they parked in front of a small building bearing the name Josie’s Diner.” It’s cleaner, I think, and doesn’t sound repetitive. Make sense?

Also consider punctuation. A lot of your sentences are difficult to read because there are no breaks. I wouldn’t necessarily call them run on sentences, but they’re close. Watch your dialogue tags, too. 

Sometimes the tags don’t match how the character seems to be speaking. You should do what you can to match your tags with how the character is speaking, this ties in with punctuation. “You said we could,” Carly yelled” Doesn’t make much sense, right?

Radish is a plant, not an animal. Just an observation.

A reference back to Roxanne. Perfect. It’s great that you reflected back on that subject, and it’s even better that you did it in a short paragraph rather than an extensive thought.

Please tag when people are speaking unless it’s only a two part conversation. It is so difficult to keep up with who is talking, and honestly I’ve just given up trying.

Carly is going to get herself into a boatload of trouble if she doesn’t relax. Cat seems to see the best in everyone and everything, so of course she’s not going to think of Carly, someone who is supposed to be a friend to her (kind of ), trying to steal her boyfriend. And Robbie is so in love with Cat that he wouldn’t notice what Carly is trying to do, either. This is going to be a huge mess.

Plus, who does Carly think she is? She’s trying to steal somebody else’s boyfriend while shooting down a guy like Gibby who could, and probably would, take very good care of her. At least he’d be fun to be around and help her chill the eff out, right?

Okay, they’re at the College of Arts and Science campus for the festival, about to scope out where they’ll be performing. Let the adventures unfold!

Whoa…Jade just said thank you? To Robbie? I must be dreaming!

Shit. Robbie caught Carly. This is not going to end well.

*Gag* shut up, Carly.

Trina/Spencer. This is well written and exciting. I never imagined Trina and Spencer together, but now that I see them together it’s like a perfect match.

All of that tension building up to the kiss was perfect! And Spencer pulling away talking about professionalism. Honestly, I don’t think I could have written this scene better myself.

Hotshot Ian Reardon coming up to the stage. I think this is the first time we’ll really see Jade nervous and not just a hint at being nervous.

Is Jade concerned about going to school in Seattle? I’m sure if Beck stayed in L.A. and she went to Seattle they would be just fine, right?

Okay, so the gang is preparing sets for the play since the sets they brought weren’t enough to cover the whole stage. Enter the iCarly people.

Forbidden love story? How clever.

I’ve always wondered how Sam and Carly managed to remain friends. They’re like polar opposites. Then 

again, each flaw they have somehow mold together so maybe they’re the perfect best friends.

Karaoke would be (will be?) interesting to read about. I just don’t see Sam getting up and singing, but maybe she’ll entertain us with one of her famous raps.

I like how the guys hate sushi and the girls love it.

Trina is really laying it on thick. She’s definitely playing dirty here. Come on, Trina, you have to understand there’s a level of professionalism Spencer has to maintain since he’s your boss.

I feel like this would be a really awkward moment, like Carly, Tori and Cat would have seen Spencer jump back, but they seem oblivious to the awkwardness. Well, I guess Carly kind of feels it.

Trina’s asking for help? Wow. And she’s sort of being nice about it too.

Trina and Carly should really team up to come up with nasty ways to seduce the boys since they’re so determined to get what they want. Carly is being such a sneaky little rat. Not to say I don’t love it, but I love Cabbie more.

Gibby and Freddie teasing Spencer is classic. It’s so funny. But I can’t help but feel bad for Gibby because 

Carly is such a gank.

Apparently Luke’s isn’t such a bad place. It sounds pretty classy from the description.

I’ll be honest, the mega-watt smile thing is getting repetitive. Try to find another way to describe their flirting smiles.

Jade is so distracted with her play.

I’d love to hear Gibby sing. Just saying.

If I could make Sam Puckett my idol, I definitely would. Just her personality and her “I don’t take any shit” attitude. Too bad she’s a fictional character.

I LOVE L.A. BOYZ! The song…I’ve never met a boy from L.A. All the guys I meet from California are like 45 years old or older.

Andre definitely should have turned his head when Tori went to kiss his cheek. Everyone knows they want each other. Hell, even they know it. What’s the waiting for?

Oops. Spencer just kissed Trina. Bet he’ll regret that one soon enough.

Puking in her cream soda lol so funny. I can just imagine her gagging away.

So, Carly’s referring to Cat as “your girlfriend” when talking to Robbie. Interesting.

STOP PLAYING IN THE MUD, CARLY! Man this evil side of you is so unattractive. Do you really think a man is going to love you when you’re trying to steal him from his lady? Stupid gank.

YES! Finally. It’s about damn time Tandre got back together! Or sort of back together. I’m hating Tori more and more as this fic goes on.

Five boyfriend points lost for Robbie. Why? Because I think he should have taken Cat aside, worked through her anger and jealousy and made her feel better instead of just trying to brush it off. I mean, if Robbie is going to be an openly romantic, understanding person then I have some pretty high expectations for him.

Freddorkly. I like that one.

I kind of wish Sam would have smacked Carly.

I’m still waiting for Sam to wack Carly with the buttersock.

This play sounds awesome. Jade is definitely a good writer. I wish it were a real play.

You can tell Cat is really torn. On one hand, she wants to trust her boyfriend whole-heartedly, but she is also feeling very insecure. I don’t blame her, Carly was practically up Robbie’s ass while they were dancing. She really should mention how uncomfortable it made her, though. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t trust Robbie. You can trust your boyfriend and not trust a girl around him, especially if your boyfriend is a really sweet guy who doesn’t see the worst in people.

I beg to differ, Tori. Carly was acting like a total gank AND a boyfriend stealer.

I don’t trust this Ian guy. He seems sneaky.

So Tori and Andre are going to try their hand at dating. Well, it’s a step in the right direction, right?

Sam just needs to come out with it. Freddie could probably help her figure out how to knock Carly back into nice girl land.

Oh shut UP Tori. Why do I hate the polly prissy pants in this story? Carly and Tori are my least favorite characters in this story. Probably Carly more than Tori, but that’s beside the point.

I think Sam and Cat could get along if they tried. Sam just has to be a tad less intimidating and Cat needs to be a lot more aggressive. Yeah, they’ll probably never get along. But at least Cat has Robbie to help keep her calm on the double date.

Robbie just earned his five boyfriend points back.

Yes! I’ve missed Jade’s overreacting.

Whoa. What just happened? BECK! What the hell are you doing?

Bam! Way to go Cat! I LOVE this Cat!

Okay, so I jumped the gun earlier assuming that Sam and Cat could never REALLY get along, but let’s admit it. When you think of Sam and Cat together you think of murder, right? I do! I just can’t imagine Sam could get along with a girl that peppy and cheery. She’s a much higher level of happy than Carly.

We’re about to find out what kind of scumbag this Ian is.

SCUM! I wonder if this means Jade will apologize?

Ohhhh shit! Is Jade going to get busted for something?

Nope. I guess not. Thankfully. Jade is a smart cookie, she’s a strong cookie too. She can handle herself.

A nice conversation between Sam and Cat to round out chapter 11 is perfect.

No rating until the end. 

Monster (21-25)

Monster

Twilight

The.Bloody White.Wolf.xoxo

Summary: I'm nothing but a monster burning in a hell that only exists in my head. There's no hope left until one harmless glance chances logic and binds two eternal enemies together in a twist of fate. Can the escape from this hell be found in an infuriating dimpled grin? Or is this another dark, dirty trick of my own mind? A forbidden passion, heat, and intense anger—this is no fairytale.

 

 

Alright guys, this review has been a long time coming and I thank The.Bloody White.Wolf.xoxo for the patience and understanding. I thoroughly enjoyed the first part of the piece, and I'm anxious to re-start the second now that I understand everything about your main character. Thank you for giving me the chance to do a review on this fic and for sitting back quietly while I got through the first 20 chapters.

 

With that said, I have to inform you guys that while I'm ONLY reviewing chapters 21-25, there are several (20, obviously) chapters before this that you MUST read. It really is neccessary to understand what's going on and it's a great read. So read part 1 before jumping straight into part 2 so you'll know everything you need to know about the main character. Okay? Okay.

 

 

 

So we start off with Jordan fighting a vampire. At least I'm pretty sure she's fighting a vampire. She could be imagining it because of what another vampire did to her parents, but I'm going to go with my first thought, which is that she's actually fighting one. She has several flashbacks in this chapter, and they're all interesting to read. Who am I kidding? The whole fic is interesting to read. First, you have the word choice throughout, which is great. That, combined with Jordan's obvious anger issues really tie together for an interesting premise. Perhaps I'm just far too interested in death and murder. Being inside Jordan's head is a lot of fun for me. 

 

My first random question that has almost nothing to do with this fic: if the smell of vampires absolutely disgusts wolves, I can't imagine the taste of them is any better. So, is it the anger that makes them capable if tearing apart a vampire without a second thought, or do they just do it to get it over with? 

 

While I have much respect and admiration for Jordan, I just cant see a wolf being able to click a lighter on. I think, maybe, if she were lying on the ground with the lighter held between her paws and she was really, really talented she could, but even with opposable thumbs I suck at creating that wicked flame. But, let's be honest here, guys. Anybody who has read Monster has, at some point, considered Jordan their hero. Right? The girl has been through hell and back like six times and still manages to be tough and now cower away. Not only that, but she's been on her own more than any 17 year old should have been and she's managed to survive. I mean, let's face it. I lost my grandma and didn't write for months. I didn't really do much of anything besides look for a job and stuff. I look like a big baby compared to Jordan Uley, even if she is a fictional character. Don't lie, you know you look like a big baby compared to her too. The girl (wolf) is ripping her own fur off without blinking an eye! You can't compete with that.

 

One of my favorite things about this fic is how Jordan IS the white wolf, but sometimes refers to herself in third person while she's the wolf. The multiple personalities thing is pretty awesome, even if technically it would sort of make her crazy. My obsession with death makes it impossible for me to see her as a bad kind of crazy, but I suppose to a normal person she would be psychotic. Oh well, I don't care. 

 

Wolf Vs. Vampire is interesting enough. Wolf Vs. Wolf? Let me grab my popcorn. 

 

I find it ironic that Jordan is a white wolf, yet she's so full of hatred and darkness. It's like an oxymoron. Does that make sense? Probably not, but I usually don't. 

 

Enter Bella and Victoria.

 

"You could be right. But you're not." haha I LOVE this line. But honestly, Jordan has quite the attitude. At some points it's amusing, at others it's just like 'why can't you just be nice?' but overall, I don't blame her for having it. She's spent her entire life dealing with shit and I think at this point she has the right to be pissed off at the world. I'm very curious as to why Sam is now demanding Jordan come home and help kill Victoria when only two and a half years ago he sent her home because she killed a vampire. Well, I suppose it wasn't REALLY because she killed a vampire. It was more that she hurt a member of the pack TO kill the vampire, but you get the idea. He didn't think she could handle it before, but she can now? Oh, Sam.

 

Is anybody else cheering for Jordan and Paul to get together? I think I've been cheering for it since Paul entered the fic, to be honest.

 

We're finally getting more interaction from Nicole now aside from 'I don't want to hang out with my little sister'. It's great, and I'm very interested in seeing where the relationship between Jordan and Nicole is headed.  

 

And chapter 21 ends with Jordan wanting to slaughter to Cullens along with Victoria. Sounds about right.

 

 

 

 

 

 

It's nice to open the chapter up with Jordan cooperating, even if it IS just to off the Cullens. At least this opens up a door for her to be more compassionate and understanding and helpful in the future, though I don't see any of these things happening.

 

Alright, she just shifted back to her human form and is totally naked. Hands up if you kind of want Paul to show up and be like 'oh, uh, stutter stutter stutter, sorry' lol. I really feel like this review is going to be very heavy on the Paul/Jordan fangirl freak out. Although now I'm curious. It must be really weird for Jordan to be back in her human form after being a wolf for so long. i don't imagine she shifted back and forth much in the last 2 1/2 years. I wonder if she's going to have to sort of 're-learn' everyting.

 

Okay, every time I read Jake as a wolf now it reminds me of watching Eclipse with my sister. I love her, but watching movies with her when she's gotten no sleep (due to my dear, precious, five month old niece) is next to impossible. She talks through the entire thing and asks the stupidents questions. She won't accept my answers, either. Anyway, do Jake and the other wolves recognize Jordan as a human? And why doesnt she want them to see her? Is she shy? I mean, she's clothed now, and she's going back to help fight the vampires, so why hide? Jordan is a weird, weird girl. 

 

Still shipping, still shipping, still shipping. The fact that she seems so irritated and Paul and Jared are still messing around is classic. It really helps balance the negetive of Jordan. Right now, though, I'm slowly dying and going to fangirl heaven. They HAVE to get together. If they don't, I will be very upset. 

 

My one dislike of this fic: why the heck does Jordan call Sam dad? And why does Sam allow it? Honestly, her dad was murdered. It's not like he ran off or something. Besides, wasn't her dad Sam's brother?

 

How does Jordan know Emily's name? Or is it just a reference?

 

OoO Makah rez. Shit. I feel a war coming on. Hardcore. I wonder if that's part of the reason Jordan hates her. I can't imagine why she would hate Emilly so much just because she's dating Sam. Or maybe she really liked Leah and doesn't want to see someone else come in and ruin that. Either way, I feel a little bad for her. She finally comes home (good intentions or not) and is bombarded with all this crazy news of imprinting and shifting and the like. But she's Jordan freakin' Uley, and she survives everything.

 

Alright, LOVE the Jacob/Jordan conversation, regardless of whether Jordan was feeling it or not. I wonder what happened between Jake and Nicole that she doesn't really talk to him anymore. I also wonder if Nicole was ever jealous of the attention Jordan got from the public, even if it was bad. Did Nicole ever think Jordan was just seeking attention? I have sisters, I know how those thoughts go. I have an older and a younger sister. I know both ways.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Alright, starting to learn more that Jordan has no self control at all, and I think this has to do with her being on her own the first time she changed to a wolf. I assume that all new wolves have a difficult time learning how to control themselves, but being on your own and making no attempt to control herself really did her in. It doesn't take much to trigger Jordan, and it's a little freaky.

 

Jordan and a test? For what? What the hell is going on?

 

I'm pathetic, but everytime I see Paul's name I do this crazy, creepy fangirl smile like 'yeah, I know what YOU'RE thinking.' (Still shipping).

 

Jordan is spiraling down into a dark, black hole. That's the only way I can picture it. It's like she can't control herself in any aspect of her life. Her thoughts, actions or feelings. It's scary to think of her drinking since she's got this anger boiling down inside of her, and while she might feel like it helps tame that wild side, it's really just going to end up making her more aggressive. Sadly, I'm excited for this. And Leah, God I really feel for her. It sucks when the person you love chooses somebody else, although in this case at least she knows it's going to work out. Then again, I don't know if that's better or worse. Knowing that you never have a chance with him again, or hoping that you will and ending up disappointed. Anybody want to weigh in on this?

 

How old is Jordan now? If she's under 21, how did she manage to get alcohol. I should pay attention to these things.

 

When I picture Jordan dancing, it's more like an unbalanced, awkward, middle school show off kind of thing. Nothing really graceful about it. Then again, I'm being stereotypical assuming that wolves can't dance.

 

Why do I have this sudden feeling that she's about to go off and have sex with some guy...and that guy won't be Paul? God I hope not.

 

Oh thank God she didn't have sex with him. Seriously, she needs to save herself for Paul. But honestly, it's crazy how she can so easily lose herself and shift. It kind of makes me wonder if she's going to randomly burst into wolf form in the middle of the city or something. Wouldn't that be a shock to everyone.

 

And Jordan is back to wanting to kill the Cullens.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jordan literally hates everything. Have I mentioned that yet? And the fact that she thinks she's going to get her older sister's respect is a joke, whether she thinks she can force it from her or not. I'm 20 years old and my sister still doesn't respect me. It must be that 'I was born first, I'm superior to you' thing.

 

We get a description of a hallway in Sam's house and a description of Jordan's room. Quite interesting. We also get a glimpse into her diary (journal, maybe?) and it's a little bit dark and heavy. Then again, what did you expect.

 

Holding. My. Breath. Breathe, Hollie. Breathe. In. Out. In. Out. FINALLY! THANK YOU GOD!!

 

Just as quickly as it started it was over. Thank you for ruining that moment for us (me) Jordan. I appreciate that. Honestly, stop throwing a tantrum. You knowy ou love Paul. You want to be with him. Suck it up, buttercup and let him LOOOVEEE you!! Anyway, Paul really rounded this out what with not taking it hard and actually joking about it. It gives me a little more faith in this ship. Is there a name for them? Jaul? Pordan? Jaul works way better. That is what I shall refer to them as from now on.

 

Okay, Jordan. You really let Paul run off and then you went to sleep? You. Suck. 

 

 

 

 

 

You know what I think would help Jordan sleep? Yoga, Paul and cuddling. Yeah, I know Jordan probably isn't the cuddling type, but I don't care. She can't deny her love forever!!

Whoa. Quite the dream there, Jordan. Vampire in front of you and being forced to stay put. I bet you almost died.

 

The big, bad fight. Yeah, I'm not clever, but I'm just getting into the buildup for this wolf/Cullen/Victoria fight and I'm anxious about it, but I have to make notes so I can write a review on it, so I make myself stop reading to do so.

 

I kind of feel like having the kissing conversation through wolf telepathy is a bad idea, especially with Sam standing there. Not only did Paul make Jordan mad by kissing her, but now he's going to let ALL the wolves know he kissed her, so she has twice as many reasons to hate him. But really, she needs to give Paul a break. He seems like a nice guy, and he's clearly into her. Even if he blames kissing her on being tired and out of it. And when Jordan refers to Paul as her best friend, I become very childish and just go 'best friend...or LOVER?'

 

Maybe it's because I love the Cullens, but why do the wolves hate them so bad if they're not doing anything wrong? Is it just a grudge because of the evil, nasty vampires who kill people? This is something I don't think I'll quite understand...ever.

 

Why is anyone betting on who is going to get Victoria? Didn't they see Jordan in action? She's a lean, mean, killing machine. My bet is on her.

 

It's insensitive of me, but I like Jared's dig at Leah.

 

Okay, mini battle is over. Really, even if it was funny, they should try to understand Leah's situation. Then again, Leah should just stop feeling sorry for herself and move on, or at least not subject everyone else to her pain. It's not their fault that Sam imprinted. Hell, it's not even Sam's fault. Again, I'm being insensitive.  

 

It's very interesting to read this from the wolf point of view. I was just watching Eclipse with my sister the other night, and this is the ONE scene I remember for sure from it. I like how this is going, even if I know what's going to happen.

 

First comment-Paul and Jordan fighting together? SIGN! Second comment-if Emmett runs and he crosses the line back into his territory, do the wolves stop or do they risk it?

 

Oh Jordan. Jordan, Jordan, Jordan.

 

I picture the wolves jumping around like the dogs at my moms house do (when we get my dog, my sisters dogs and my moms dogs together that is) just larger form. It's funny, to be honest.

 

Wow, Jordan backed off on her own. I wonder what Emmett did that made her rethink her decision. It's very interesting that in a matter of seconds her whole self changed. I'm, of course, going to continue to read this, but this is the end of the review.

 

 

 

 

Rating: 4/5

 

While I love your word choice and your glimpse into the Jaul relationship, I am a little hesitant as far as Jordan's attitude goes. I'm finding her very hard to read (as in, I can't quite understand her). There were a few moments that made me lean in toward the screen, but they seemed over in a flash. Overall, though, you've done an excellent job. I'm looking forward to reading more.